Trader Joe’s says: Our Trader Joe’s Ginger Snaps are made with all natural ingredients and have that crispy, crunchy texture one would expect from these spicy little cookies. They’ve been sweetened with just the right blend of sugar and molasses, and ofcourse we’ve made sure to mix in generous amounts of ground ginger to achieve that nice ginger-y bite that ginger fans know and love.

Abi says: It is always a shame when gluten-free friends come out for dinner and forego buns and cake because of dietary restrictions. And while it is easy enough to produce gluten-free meals at home, desserts are sometimes a challenge. That’s why I like to make pumpkin spice cheesecake and use these gluten free ginger snaps for the crust.

These aren’t the gingersnaps you’re used to seeing on supermarket shelves. Those ones are overpowered by molasses and lack the tang of non-powdered ginger. These ginger snaps from Trader Joe’s are a bit crumblier than other gluten-containing varieties, but they pack a lot more flavor into each little cookie.

Perfect for a late night snack with a glass of milk or making a flavorful crust for your next Millionaire Pie.

Frito Lay says: The loudest tasting snacks on Earth.

We say: There are two types of people in this world: folks who enjoy corn chips covered in buttermilk powder and spices and folks who don’t. We suspect that Cool Ranch Doritos are simply plain corn chips covered in Hidden Valley Ranch powder. That’s okay because they are still delicious.

Kellogg’s says: Crunchy almonds and hearty oats meet a rich chocolatey coating. Each bite of Sweet & Salty granola bars introduces you to a perfect mix of flavors.

Abi says: In the past I may have mentioned love for a certain Nature Valley granola bar. They redefined my relationship with granola and made for just about the perfect item to keep tucked in a tote bag. After finding those beauties, Snack Lounge set out on a mission to find all of the best almond-focused granola bars. As a part of this search we found the healthy Kashi Honey Almond Flax bar and this offering from Kellogg’s. And then we gave up because the results were so depressing we thought “Why do we keep subjecting the palate to these awful snacks?”

Well, we do it for you. The trouble with this bar starts with the word ‘chocolatey.’ As an occasional CandyBlog reader, one should know that the c-word doesn’t mean that it is made with chocolate. No, it means that we’re looking at something that merely resembles chocolate. It means a chocolate impostor. It means lies.

Pair that with a really weird smell that was definitely not just almonds. Maybe it was the NIACINAMIDE and PYRIDOXINE HYDROCHLORIDE. Oh, just kidding. Those are sciency words for vitamins and minerals. But I’m not joking about the weird smell or taste. As an almond-lover I found the bar distinctly off-putting. Give me a Nature Valley granola bar any day.

Quaker Oats says: Quaker® Sweet & Salty Crunch Granola Bars are the wholesome sweet & salty bar that will satisfy your cravings. Enjoy flavor combinations like the sweetness of honey combined with the crunch of salty nuts and toasted oats!

Abi says: I bought a set of three Quaker Crunch Granola bars because they were on sale. I prefer my granola bars chewy and when a granola bar has “Crunch” in its name, I do not expect my teeth to have a fine time. These bars are not well-balanced in their sweet and salty duality. The ’sweet’ definitely takes over the entire bar experience, overpowering any potential nutty savoriness with a quick kick of sugar and corn syrup.

First Five Ingredients:

• Whole grain rolled oats
• Sugar
• Crisp Rice (rice flour, sugar, salt, dextrose, corn syrup solids, malted barley flour)
• Corn Syrup
• Cashew Splits

The Verdict: Honey comes after sugar, corn syrup, and artificial flavors on the ingredients list. Yikes! We’ll be looking to satisfy our sweet and salty cravings elsewhere.

Lara says: Two ingredients, one incredible flavor! The unprocessed, creamy cashews are rich in iron, zinc and B Vitamins. The chewy dates have more potassium than bananas. Together they form a bar rich in fiber with 2 grams of heart-healthy Omega-6 fatty acids and 15 essential vitamins and minerals. So much sustaining nourishment in such a simple recipe.

Abi says: The energy bar section of Trader Joe’s is always good for an interesting snack or two. Tired of searching for the elusive Fiberful Bar and refusing to toss half a package of Fiberful ends and pieces, I decided to take a chance on the Larabar.

After scanning the shelves and seeing the words “Cashew” and “Cookie” I knew I’d found my perfect energy bar match.

Or had I?

Initially looks were promising: the bar was studded with cashew pieces and featured a distinctly cookie-like appearance and texture. Mmmmm, cookies. But looks aren’t everything. I’d learned that lesson the hard way in Italy, realizing that while Italian bakers made some pretty incredible tarts, they uniformly sucked at producing delicious cookies.

But this isn’t a cookie, it is a energy bar masquerading under the name ‘cookie’. I’m used to it by now, the bars with ‘cookie’ and ‘pie’ in the names. I’m just waiting for Belgian Waffle and New York Cheesecake flavored bars. They probably already make those flavors and carry them at my local GNC alongside enormous tubs of what amount to legal steroids. And I avoid GNC like the plague.

SnackLounge.com isn’t about body building or poorly informed supplement salesmen. Rather, we are all about helping you avoid about an energy bar that tastes like an old brown couch. You know, one of those dismal ones in a Craigslist ad that is updated every day for two weeks before the owner realizes that nobody is going to buy that couch and finally it appears in the free section.

My mouth was not happy. First, this bar contains only dates and cashews. While I like those things and understand that they can be part of a delicious and healthy energy bar, on their own they DO NOT EQUAL CASHEW COOKIE. In fact, they’re sort of like those no-bake cookies that you make once in awhile because you forget that they’re just not that great. Yeah, like that but with even less flavor. I suppose that if the folks at Larabar added a dash of salt and a drop of vanilla to this snack then it would finally approach flavorful cookiedom. Until then, we’re sticking with Clif Chocolate Chip Cookie ZBars when we want an actual, cookie-like energy bar.

P.S. We have since then tried a couple of other LARABARs that are tasty and delicious (and not boring, like this one) and we’ll report on those in November.

Pepperidge Farm says: Journey into the texture of a Geneva cookie. An enchangtingly textured collage of indulgent delight. This beautifully decorated cookie is accompanied by a smooth chocolate later with crunchy pecans. An adventure in texture.

Abi says: Did Pepperidge Farm trademark Geneva? How does Lake Geneva feel about that? And the actual Swiss city of Geneva? Does it just refer to cookies? Could I create a line of Geneva crackers and get away with it?

Geneva cookies are seemingly exotic, European, and chocolatey. In reality, they are a ghetto cookie. The actual cookie part is not nearly as delicious as the biscuit found in Pepperidge Farm Milanos and the pecans (which are not a European nut at all, but rather a member of the North American hickory family) are merely shabby, palate-grating studs. Sure, the dark chocolate is good, but that’s certainly not the bulk of this cookie.

I’d prefer Godiva’s version of the Petit Ecolier anytime.

Frito Lay says: Turn up the volume of your snacking with the amped-up spices, high-decibel cheese, and the awesome crunch of Doritos brand tortilla chips. The bold flavors like Doritos Nacho Cheese and Cool Ranch are the loudest tasting snacks on earth.

Abi says: After trying the Doritos Zesty Taco Chipotle Ranch Collisions, I was reluctant to open this adorable little bag of Spicy Nacho Doritos.

Sure, it was just 25¢ and I could toss it if it was bad, but that wasn’t the point. The point was that I didn’t want to live in fear of potentially repulsive Doritos. I wanted to rejoice in the intrinsic Americanness of this snack. I wanted to sit back with my Doritos and enjoy a bit of television and maybe a beer.

But I didn’t want to ruin a good beer with bad Doritos.

Fortunately for me, these chips are just like the original Nacho Doritos, with a bit of added oomph in the form of spice. Not any particularly nameable spice, just some added flavor that takes them beyond the norm. Though, ‘norm’ is the wrong word because these taste nothing like any nachos I’ve ever had. You have to admit that it is pretty impressive how chip manufacturers can put any sort of flavoring on a chip, call it a name somewhat related name (nachos and this chip both have some form of cheese, right?) and we’ll eat it right up. I supposed that’s what happens when you’ve got a heavy hand with the MSG.

Nutter Butters says: Peanut Butter sandwich cookies made with real peanut butter.

Abi says: Nutter Butters are a one note cookie. Sure, they provide a layer of crisp cookie and a creamy filling, but both layers taste like off-brand peanut butter. I’m not sure why I even got excited about eating these. I love peanut butter, but it would have been much more satisfying to have the real thing rather than these cookie imitators.

Nutter Butters are much better in my memory than they are in real life. Sure, the peanut shaped cookies are adorable. But you can’t eat adorable.

Nabisco says: Su crujiente textura y su exceptional sabor son fruto de la perfecta union entre el aceite de oliva y la sabiduria de nuestros expertos.

Abi says: If you don’t speak Spanish, here is my crude translation of the product blurb:

These crispy, flavorful chips are the product of the perfect union between olive oil and our expert chip-makers.

I purchased these Olive Oil chips in Spain, so everything on the package is in Spanish. I enjoy that because it gives me a chance to practice my language skills. Also, it is fun to imagine how the text could be translated literally by a non-English speaker.

But this review isn’t about learning a second language. No, this review is about Olive Oil potato chips. That’s right, brilliantly yellow, thick, crunchy, salty chips that pretty much leap from the bag and into your mouth. Okay, so they aren’t that fantastic. They are an olive oil version of a kettle chip: a bit more heft than your average Lay’s chip. And while the Olive Oil taste is interesting, it certainly isn’t the essential, nutty, grassyness of truly fantastic olive oil. One can’t eat a lot of these chips (a selling point perhaps?) and they definitely lack the light airiness of a standard, sunflower-oil friend potato chip.

I think that America will continue to operate just fine without the Olive Oil chip. Or this olive oil chip, but foodies may be up in arms. How else will they be able to produce Ferran Adria’s Egg and Potato Chip Tortilla?

Yeah, the answer would be ‘go to Spain and get some chips’ but once you’re in Spain, fantastic tortillas de patata abound and the reason for these crisps becomes null. What a conundrum!

McDonalds says: A bag of delicious sliced and peeled apples.

Abi says: Yeah, yeah, we’re featuring a refrigerated item from McDonalds. But you know what? Apple slices rock. Yeah, yeah, they aren’t as good as a perfectly crisp Gala or Jonagold, but when you’re a mile from a grocery store and you’ve got a 30 minute lunch break, those fancy schmancy apples will have to wait. And yeah, yeah this snack is a bit expensive. But they’re still fabulous.

Why are these apple slices awesome? First, they do not require washing. Second, you won’t end up with apple skin stuck between your teeth. Third, they are somewhat good for you.

Okay, maybe they aren’t really good for you at all. A glance at the nutrition information conveys that the only thing in this bag is a crunchy combination of carbs and sugar. What it doesn’t tell you is that two (Yes, two) bags of apple slices are the ideal fry-eating deterrent. Sure, you could add caramel and call it a dessert, but I prefer to think of these guys as the perfect way to de-guilt a 6 piece box of Chicken Nuggets.